Do you remember how Ron Burgundy finished every broadcast? That’s right – “Stay Classy San-Diego.” How about Ellen De Generes at the end of every show: "See you tomorrow. Be kind to one another." "We're in touch, so you'll be in touch." Was what Hugh Downs used for years ending each episode of…..go ahead…you know it….20/20. Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark end their successful podcast (“My Favorite Murder”) with "Stay sexy, and don't get murdered." What these people and so many others have realized is the power of Emotional Anchoring. In a nutshell, something that triggers an emotional reaction every time you hear, see, tastes, smells….FEEL it.
It doesn’t have to be anything sensational nor dramatic but if you repeat it enough times, if you relate it to your message, to the experience your customers, listeners, viewers have gone through with you this is where you are anchoring it….emotionally. And this is how you make sure your audience, your customers think of you, often and with the frame of mind you anchored.
The other day I needed the right place where I could write. With my type of ADHD, I often look for a cozy place, with people around (I need the movement in the background), not too noisy so I can get in my zone. It was around 7pm and I was also somewhat hungry. The weather was pretty gloomy and cold which meant only one thing. RAMEN. Jinya Ramen Bar was the perfect spot for the vibe I was looking for. And mind you, I was looking for the right vibe, not the right location, price, food but rather the right vibe - Emotional Relevance remember…???
So, I get there, the waiter comes over and asks me how I am doing. I respond with….”who cares? How are YOU doing?”
“Every language we learn is a portal to connecting with another language. The more you know, the more you can speak. It’s not just about seeing or hearing, it’s about feeling, experiencing, sharing.”
For years, every time someone would ask me how I was doing, I would reply with: “Always Good!” My own little Emotional Anchoring through the years. My colleagues, customers, friends and even strangers would respond to that somewhat overly happy sprinkled with a touch of ignorance positive guy most times with a smile back and a smirk of jealousy. The thing is that when I would meet the same person again, whether the same waiter in a restaurant, the same customer on a follow up call, the same neighbor, they would already wait for that up-beat and happy “Always Good”. They would already finish the response with me smiling with me as they do that. This is how I would trigger that Emotional Anchor I planted last time we connected. These are the moments when I am certain they remember me. Remember the vibe. They may not remember my name, but they remember the vibe. The positive, energetic vibe I knowingly set when we met. After doing it for a while, this became a routine for me, an automatic behavior. I plant Emotional Anchors daily. Sometimes few a day.
In the customer relationship world, when you follow this routine, especially during an initial sale cycle, when decision time arrives for the customer to select between you and two other vendors, and your point of contact there brings the three proposals in front of the C-level lady to decide. That lady who attended only 1 of the 4 sessions you’ve had with this customer, and she, the C-level boss lady, turns to your point of contact and says: “remind me again which of the three was this guy?” and you, without thinking about it, instinctively, start smiling, looking at your colleague who is there with you, he smiles back at you, you both nod and you say: “Ha! That is the Always Good, happy and energetic guy”. And the boss lady smiles calmly and says….: “yes, I like that guy….what’s his name again?”.
Get it?? The C-level lady does not need to remember your name. But she remembered your vibe. You were a bit different; you made an emotional impact – you set an Emotional Anchor that you designed and that could be the element that will push them to select you over your competitors (and no, this is not instead of delivering a great product and an amazing service but On Top of it). They FELT connected. They spoke YOUR language. In his Ted Talk “The language of being human”, Poet Ali talks about those connecting, interpersonal languages we speak by feelings. You made your customer smile, you got them to think about you and every time they do, they re-live that positive sensation you planted and so they relate it to you. You both now speak that language.
Mid-way into the last of the six gyozas, I notice an employee of the restaurant approaches. I look up and remember I was there at the same ramen bar about a week before for lunch. He is about 5 feet from me as our looks collide, I smile and say: “Hey, how are you man?” He smiles back and says: “Who cares! How are YOU doing? Alon right?”
We kept talking for a minute, he remembered me from the week before. He remembered my response. The Emotional Anchoring I threw out there a week earlier was so impactful on him that this guy even remembered my name. I now know his name too – Alejandro.
Finished the meal, was able to write what I hoped to write, paid, packed my stuff and walked towards the door.
As I open the door, Alejandro yells from across the bar: “See you next week Alon”.
Did he just Emotionally Anchored me??? He sure did! Think about it. Look at the name of this blog, the subject of the email when you receive this blog, your reaction when you read the words Two Weeks Notice. You experience some emotional reaction, you know the vibe of this write-up. And I sure hope you are smiling right now.
What is your Emotional Anchor? How are you setting it up on an ongoing basis? Start small. Think of one business relationship you are about to start. Pick one. And plan an Emotional Anchor for your interaction with this person/people. Make it your own. A specific question you will ask every time you start a conversation with them, maybe a personal story where you are sharing a weekly routine of yours. Perhaps a Did you know kind of a thing at the end of each session (something for them to look for on future calls). Make it a habit. The rest will follow.
And with that…..
See you next week. Well actually, if you notice…in two weeks.