“I want to believe him. I really do. I want it to be a true story, a real testimony” I’m thinking to myself one night watching a guy in a commercial swearing on his kids that this new diet he is on really works. “I tried at least 6 other diets, I have been bullied” he continues as I feel sorry for the guy and happy for him on the same time as he eventually did lose all that weight that has been holding him back in so many aspects. Looking at his before and after photos I am thinking to myself, how long did it take? How much of a struggle it must have been for the guy. And I am happy for him.
It is clear we want to believe those who are sharing with us their personal story as in our core, we are good. We root for the hero who struggled and came out victorious. We relate to them because we struggle as well. And when we see someone who has done it, like us, we relate to them. We cheer for their achievements as if they are our own. But it seems that most of us, use others’ victories as another excuse to stay stagnant. To not go ahead with their own desires and wishes. It is the struggle ahead that scares most of us.
I know, been there. Most of us have, and still are.
How many books, videos, presentations, speaking engagements have you been through, read, listened to during the last few years where successful business figures are telling you how they struggled, pushed through and made it. I know. I read and listened to at least 100 of those in the last couple of years. From Jim Collins’ – Good to Great, through Tony Robbins sessions, about 40 episodes of “How I Built This” hosted by Guy Raz, “You are a badass” by Jen Sincero, Charles Duhigg’s The Power of Habit, Rich dad poor dad by Robert Kiyosaki and “The Success Principles” by Jack Canfield. As I reflect and contemplate about all of these and others, I found two things they all have in common. Persistency and “The Jump”.
“One dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared in the horizon”
When it comes to persistency, they all talk about how hard they had to work and grind through long periods of times and through different challenges and struggles. They lost faith along the way many times but kept pushing. They were so close to giving up but then got a sort of a break. Perhaps it was a small advice from someone that changed everything or a last-minute investment. But they never gave up until they made it through. Well, apparently, most people give up pretty early in the process. When the struggle just starts. Again, those same excuses as I mentioned before. Most of us are simply not struggle savvy. Most of us didn’t need to go through real, long term struggle in our lives. “The Jump” – each one of these business and life development experts mentions in their book, lecture, presentation etc. the last step, the jump, crossing the chasm or other metaphor of some crucial step towards that so elusive blissfulness of self fulfilment. What they refer to is the gap between talking about it and actually doing it. Most people by far end up just talking about it and hence, when we see someone who actually did it, someone who has gone through hardship but eventually made millions or the guy who finally lost weight and became a super successful trainer….we root for them.
The way I see things, we all were forced during these past months to go through the struggle and be persistent. We didn’t have a choice. We had to accept whatever came our way and keep going. Our businesses closed, we got laid off, we collected unemployment funds for the first time in our lives, we were quarantined, we got to wear masks, Zoom our kids to school and keep our distance from one another. If that is not persistency through struggle, I don’t know what is.
I believe that those of us who fought, proactively looked for ways to deal with the struggle, who realized they must be consistent and go the distance are those who will be best prepared to take that jump.”
I believe the struggle makes us stronger. I believe opening our minds and our hearts to accepting new struggles comes with new opportunities, new friends and new business which will prepare us much better to take that jump if we decide to go for it. It is still a challenging task, a gutsy move but I believe more of, going into 2021, will dare to do so and find their self fulfilment bliss. I believe many of us have become those heroes we used to root for through those struggles and difficult times and I believe we should listen to our hearts.
I know I have. And while I am still struggling (yes, after that jump you will still struggle but they won’t write about it in those books otherwise, sales will drop…😉 ) I have never in my fulfilling life been so fulfilled.
“The darkest hour of the night came just before the dawn”
I believe the darkest hour is now. At the tail end of this world pandemic and we can already see the crack of dawn We don’t have to want to believe to anyone else’s story anymore as this is OUR story. Root and cheer for your own achievements. You’ve been persistent through these struggles and became stronger through it.
Just like the guy I cheered for in the diet commercial. It’s a process. The AFTER picture was not taken the same day as the BEFORE picture. It’s a process. Go look at some emails of yours from March of this year. Check out your calendar in May. Speak with your friends, family, colleagues about your struggles in July. This is YOUR before picture. Then look at yourself today. Understand the struggle. The process and cheer. Cheer for yourself for getting ready for YOUR overnight success.
Listen to your heart.
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